hey
back in s'pore now

and i m havin quite a lazy time here
think i'll take some time to get back to the routine...
haha

anyways, i'll be leaving for thailand soon in like another 10 hours, and till then, i m not expecting to sleep coz of the Euro '08 match and also the l8r chores that i have to finish..

so well,
things dont seem to be any different, except for the fact, that *** better than b4...
yups..
guess, after so many days, i just realised that it would get really confusing for you to focus on one thing....and handle certain things...

but nvr mind, i'll try my best to be strong and not let the fear eat me...but as far as i know,
i wont be that strong..this time..



well,
i'll read a book or something now..
will try to update again SOOn


bbye
Sandesh

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aaarrrgh,
2 days to go, and i am so bored..

i dont know where to get on from here...i mean, should i carry it on, and go through, tearing away all that comes in the way, or should i do it in the old fashioned WAY..
i dont know,
i mean, ya...nvr mind
so well, here i am,


i miss ppl so much...so much so that,
i had a dam weird dream last night about 'em..lol
but the only person who made me brighten up (in my dreams, of course) would be someone..
haha

aw, she was such a darling and awesomely cute...i mean..she still is..haha
well, lets see how things turn out to be...

and since i gotta run off soon, coz mom wants to take me shopping (BUT I DONT WANT TO...shopping isnt my thing to do)

well nvr mind,
so basically thats..it

and well i just want this one thing to get though "immigration" in my pockets...and after which, i'll be the CyberBeast again, in EVERYTHING..
mark my words for that..

lol
ya


anyways,
tk care
BbYe


Sandesh

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hey guys..
i dont know what to say here,

but i feel like kicking myself..
i feel so bad...and now that the communication gaps are blurred,
i cant even see across the bridge,

and in a hope to rebuild a new bridge,
i cant find my angel,
it seems to be lost, or should i say
it got lost coz of my carelessness,
and needless to say, i am facing the consequences,
the mere thought of me losing my angel,
kills me off for a moment,
and now that i cant find it, its
becoming even more painful..

i want to see those sweet smiles, AGAIN
i want to hear that lovely voice, AGAIN
i want to taste the sweetness of that soft-warm heart, AGAIN
i want to smell happiness in the air, AGAIN
i want to touch that beauty, AGAIN
and i want to say I M SORRY,

AGAIN


:(
must study now,
grld reminded me ystrdy..


maybe i'll update again l8r...






"the sea is so calm, AGAIN"
h8 myself


di

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lately i have been thinking about something..and i realised that maybe the world hasnt yet matured to an extent to define relationships in 'broader' senses..ya. I had this thought last evening, when i was thinking about this wonderfully special person whom i know..(YES ITS U, IF u R READING THIS..u know who..), i was thinking about the dual elements in the relationship and i guess, maybe when u r in 'that' position where the world looks up to you from a very very very wide perspective you tend to divide..but somewhere in those divisions, we tend to forget those "aang's" (character from the cartoon Avatar: The Last Airbender) amidst the crowd, who dont even fear a single thing just for the sake of happiness...well, i wont really say that all the above claims of mine, are true, i mean come on, i havent even experienced this freaking world more than the special person, but ya...

and now that there are so many people viewing different perspectives, i am already getting the gut feeling that, this world is better a lonely place for me and later, if not soon, everything will crash onto me and there would be no one....

couldnt sleep properly yesterday night, was thinking about somethings.... some MOMENTs actually, and believe me, i could actually see them happening in front of me.. and the next thing..

sigh sigh,
i cant help all this happening to me,
its just bound to happen, i mean,
why in the world should i get a right to live happily

after going back, the countdown would have already begun, for the biggest fall of my life..to part with someone, whom i respect more than my own life, for whom this world means nothing to me...
even though the very thought kills the view from my eyes, and makes me shiver, but at the end of it all, i guess, i'll still be there to say..i <3 style="color: rgb(0, 0, 0);">
aah time, the only thing that makes the difference now...

dont go..
be there, please be there
i m still a baby,
and the world is so strange..

well, i m sure, i wont be able to take the pain,
cause, it really hurts to separate the physical visibility in this state of haziness although, atleast i think, the mind's and heart's connections will be strong..FOR LIFE..

i'll upload a picture here, maybe that would have a deeper impact to this post..


crying...
my heart out
quietly...
screaming...




aah, well,
yesterday was quite fine,
spent the whole day creating a software for Pocket PC,
the next in line for my company's calculator series Hypercube Calca,
the only difference is that, now pocket pc and smartphone editions will be launched..
woohoo,

yups...

well, thats all for now, i'll perhaps update again..






<3
Sandesh

u complete me, believe it or not..u do
pls reply...i need to talk to someone..
and there is only one SOMEONE in this world whom i trust..



:(

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I just dont know what is happening around me. I am lost within myself, perhaps thinking about the unknown, thinking about the so called "un-happening" but maybe there is a link to it somewhere, somewhere in my mind but then, i just cant let it out. well, yesterday got to know that ppl are actually doing unexpected things these days, i mean, ya its okay to do that, but NOW..??? it made me feel so bad, i couldnt help thinking that maybe my logic is ACTUALLY wrong, and well, i m really sad about it apart from being sad about other things...and i really cant help it..i suck at it anyways...

welll, i'll try my best though, am planning to finish maths homework today...dont think will have enough time, but then nothing wrong in "planning" right..??

alone at the moment...with nothing left to do, time seems to be of total waste to me, and people..
well, people are different..
ya

i m still waiting for someone's something..
haha, vague??? i know, cant help it, dont wanna reveal it..
and i am really working very very hard on "surprises" for people, but its just not happening...
i mean the magic is just not working..

yups..
haha,
gerald clicked photos of his guitar...ystrday.

lolz

nothing more from me..
i m sick n tired of this game,
i wanna REFRESH it..



maybe..




missing someone very badly....
but i m so bound by restrictions...
i just cant help it..

SaNdEsH
:D


(pls pls, no wrong inferences behind how i ended of with my name...and for those who cant resist thinking of it...then well, there was nothing like that...all of this just dint happen...i dont know why everyone...including "the person" got the wrong idea...)

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i am in a fix now..its like the same one as that of my birthday happiness analogy..

for those of u who dont know, think abt it,

on my birthday, should i be happy that i survived another year in this freaking world, or should i be sad that it marks one year closer to my death, which isnt really gonna affect many people..
haha


so ya..

i dont know what to do.
i am still waiting though..
not knowing my mistakes yet..
coz i never intended to commit them

the weekend was quite relaxing, although i couldnt stop myself thinking about something...rather someone..
ya..

celebrated Dad's birthday yesterday..haha, he treated us at Pizza Hut.. woohoo..it rocked...


well, i m in no mood, to talk abt anything now..too sad about something..
(but thats not the reason i changed my blogskin....as some of you have been bugging me abt)

oh and ya..
seems that gerald got the guitar he wanted...i havent gone online since morning...so dont know if he's there or not..
anyways... grats man.







Sandesh
missing sis...
<3

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