Saturday, December 6, 2008

i see the shadows in the daylight,and grief in the darkness,i wanna be alone but still,it just stalks me up and down the street.prettydirtywelleverythingis twistedand so beautifullyplanned.i want to change it. NOW!shit... its so , so noot right...help me.. plst...

Friday, December 5, 2008

Silence, I dint expect it to be so disturbingly painful to shake me up. I know there are things that did not happen, some rather "unexpected" things happening...but there is nobody to blame but ME.I M TRYING MY f***ing best...BOTTOMLINE: it doesnt matterIt will..Things are goofed up and trust me.. no...

Tuesday, December 2, 2008

this is so not what i was gonna write....but i just couldnt help myself..day b4 ystrday was fun... real fun..met THE GUYS...after such a long time...and had a blast with them..watched Dostana @ Select City Walk...the movie aint that bad...(better than i expected... but could have been better..)nonetheless...

Monday, November 17, 2008

Why Me?Can I question or have I even lost the right to ask that to myself?I dont know..had a wonderfully disturbing dream last night...(not that it was so disturbing that i fell off the bed or what, but I have been thinking a lot about it, i mean do i have any other choice not to think about it?)anyways..i...

Tuesday, November 4, 2008

I can imagine that feeling setting in again. Its pretty strong and forceful. Too coercive in nature....not that i'll give up or what...i mean COME ON... this is the cyberbeast we are talking abt here..but not just that...something is becoming dark.darker than it ever could be..and its so heavy...heavy...

Sunday, November 2, 2008

going on and on..trying to be free..but somehow even imprisonment was also good.i wanna stay in it..so that i have more time..time and people...SHOULD go hand in hand..but at the moment when u step out of the prison, you feel that..it should be people and people going hand in hand..but haiz..things...

Saturday, October 25, 2008

haiz..things are just going so wild..and expectations are rising..training was interupted by TYH..., YA SURE I"LL ENLigHTEN HIM with what he wants..I'll do my best..well, i am so so so so lost...and i dont know what to do...i mean, more than anything else..i cant keep thinking about some (things, people,...

Thursday, October 23, 2008

...i think i m gonna have a heart attack soon...i want the authority to give me a good piece of news soon...and when i say soon, i really really mean it.come on life..cheer upbut,i m still sad...why isnt it going away? please go away.let me do what i want to do...i have a purpose...and i want to achieve...

Wednesday, October 22, 2008

wth...i m broken..morale breakdownFUCKpls pls pls pls pls pls pls pls pls pls pls pls plshelp me...be with me..Boston AugustanaIn the light of the sun, is there anyone? Oh it has begun...Oh dear you look so lost, eyes are red and tears are shed,This world you must've crossed... you said...You don't...

Tuesday, October 21, 2008

i m so so so not in a mood to even look up to your eyes and say.. "Hey, I am SAD"..but i guess, its all just because of one single reason, which more than anything is but too delicate for me to deviate from...in thinking terms at least...i dont want to miss it...but apparently i am...and trust me......

Monday, October 20, 2008

just experienced the thing i was least expecting....FUCK..i dont know wht to do...i mean,i have changed...someone was right...i have changed....changed like shitplease help me...please help...please..i m desperate and hlpless...she said, chances are high...but stilli m not assured...h8 myself....

Sunday, October 19, 2008

Haha, today's post is gonna be one hell of a long post...hahaso err... dont fall asleep reading it...hahaam discovering a new person these days...she's quite a "surprising" person...hahai mean, cant believe such a person was around me all the while, and i just dint know...wowright?hahabut, better late...

Tuesday, October 14, 2008

maybe i just naturally rock at sucking at everything..wht can i say...its how you feel when all your hard work...turns nothing more than piece of shit, and you seriously have no idea why it happened so..everything seems going down...and i really dont know what to do..whether i should be happy or sad???...

Monday, October 13, 2008

trying to relax....breathing deeply..hope remain..hopefully i'll get over it.....

Sunday, October 12, 2008

woah woah woah...almost there,i have to visualise the drift starting from this night onwards.whether i'll drift and get back onto the track or whether i'll fall off the edgei dont know,i m nervous, afraid...the feeling creeping in like a crawling snake, absolutely senseless, but still THERE.hahayeah,i...

Saturday, October 11, 2008

wow, so long i havent blogged...lolanyways key events...haha,V11 won inV!gorate yet again, as usual.i mean, its just a habbit we always win, we just do.floorball was the best, hope i succeeded in shutting some f'ked up mouths. haha, but thats not just it, somebody really pissed me off before the floorball...

Tuesday, September 30, 2008

at last... my company is legally on-line.Found some useful servers on Telokau Islands in the Pacific Ocean..woohoo.. for those dumbheads who dont know what i m talking about.. hahaMy company, Hypercube is officially accessible from almost anywhere on earth. Even though the site isn't yet finished,...

Wednesday, September 24, 2008

The Infinityby Five point OLearn To Give Up Fear(then You'll)learn To Be A FriendSeveral Secrets Of LifeWon't Be Learned 'till You Die...(corus)Birth, Work, BreatheSmile, Awaken, BbserveElope, Breed Look Into My Eyes And Believe In MeNurture, DivorceSuffer, CryAcknowledge ExistenceDiscover, DieLook...

Thy past is of a shadow now... I can undo it not...Speak not of my presence, see not of my coming, and breathe not of my leaving, and you will hear nothing more but the shrill melody of the wind... cant take it...i need to know soon... as soon as possible..ppl dont give up...(YES THIS REFERS TO ONE...

Monday, September 22, 2008

the third one in a day..i think i'll have definitely have a heart attack by tomorrow..fuck,my life's gonna screw up in about another 2 weeks and here i mwatching harold and kumar escape from guantanamo bay...as funny and ironical as it seems...there is more than just the opposite in it..the emotions...

every passing moment, continuously reminds me of it...i am a complete waste...every hope laid down....i broke them...every sacrifice made... it meant nothing...i cant help thinking about it..but maybe..Fits so f'kin painful...and i am so not ready for it...wtf is wrong? i dont know...maybe nothing is...maybe...

i m so doubtful..never ever in my life have i seen myself in so much doubt...so much anger for myself..but whts the point of thinking about it now...but then the consequence is fearful in itself...and i just dont want to lose everything i came to know....in a journey....its just so painful...but who'd...

Sunday, September 21, 2008

here i stand againtrying..trying..but never upto the level...and all the burden falls on to me, like the earth falling on an ant..and then there is no reason why shouldnt...but i still dont want to give up...i know there is still a lot of fire left in me..enough to burn for a hell lot of time....pls...

Friday, September 19, 2008

dont know whts gonna happen now..i think i wont be as lucky...FUCKi cant believe it...i just cant..i mean, not as if i dint do it..or wht..i ...i i... dont knowcant stop thinking about it...its just too much...my head so heavy with it...and no latter shall i receive the news and collapse..fuck...thats...

Wednesday, September 3, 2008

Its a beautiful lie, a perfect denialListen to this song - "Beautiful Lie by 30 Seconds to Mars"Its just awesome...If have enough guts listen to "The Werewolf of Westeria by John 5" its even awesome if u listen to good music....i mean i know ppl listening to GAY music, and somemore trying to sing it...

Friday, August 22, 2008

aaahh...stressed..ya..a bit relieved now..but as usual when one ends there's always another waiting in line...to smash right at my face...so ya..i guess, i know the reason why....but its just like WEIRD... yai mean, i may be wrong...but come on..events can co-incide (if u can truely guess wht it means,...

Tuesday, August 19, 2008

wtf!!! you are so not what i expected you to be...(PS. this doesnt refer to anyone living)so ya well, i wanted to post this quite a long time before, but just couldnt find the time to do it...yeah!! The Importance of a SisterA sister is someone who loves you from the heart,No matter how much you argue...

Friday, August 15, 2008

it feels so different..i feel so confused.i mean my analysis just feels so "not impactful" for me when others show theirs..its very painful, and i dont know why...but i have been going through the "2-people-saying-exactly-the-same-sentence-which-doesnt-really-make-me-feel-comfortable" siuations...and...

Tuesday, August 12, 2008

WOOOOOHHHHOOOOOOOOO!!!!!Aang defeats the Firelord and restores balance among the 4 kingdoms!!! omg, Avatar: The Last Airbender (or Avatar: The Lengend of Aang, as shown in some countries) is one...

Monday, August 11, 2008

not feeling right...nothing is.., i guess,i dont know what to do... it just slips out of my hands...the moment i try to grab it harder.the girls lost to bedok south again, which according to me is not a team to lose to.but they did play well, better than thought, i mean, for 6 people to manage 2lines...

Thursday, August 7, 2008

walking in the rain,i asked someone to smile,depite the circumstances,but i failed to remind myself...thinking about the mistakes i made,and how i could have prevented them,i could see the divergence in the light,but i know how it feels,to be on the-path, less travelled by (inspiration from william...

Monday, August 4, 2008

Your result for Which Chess Piece are You Test? ...The Queen's BishopCongrats! Only 3-5% of the population score this! The Queen’s Bishop has charisma and social knowledge. It is this that draws so many...

Sunday, August 3, 2008

Hey guys...back again..the week was fun,CAREERs..sounds serious business, but nonetheless, was one of the memorable one too...all the talks, the videos and the activities...marking the end to one of the...

Friday, July 25, 2008

are u trying to test my patience or what...dint know you were THAT dumb...i mean, have you ever given a thought about what you do when in such a situation even before when you are expecting others to do a positive follow up,come on GROW UP!! alright...be a bit more sensible for goodness sake....stop...

wth...am feeling so freaking down...and i dont really have a reason for that..:(today is so busy...aaaah,even though its a half day..planning to go training l8r..."ppl are so selfish!!"haiz..anyways..l8r Sand...

Thursday, July 24, 2008

Yesterday was one day, i'd never like to forget...i mean, i cant imagine the girls improved until like that...and i wont really "not" relate the influence of the A-Div games on them..taught the girls, some Free Hit tactics and other basic things..before the match,and unbelievably the girls follwed what...

Tuesday, July 22, 2008

WtF...thats like the only thing running in my mind at the moment...and well i guess, i have valid reasons for that as well....went to support the A-Div's final match....and i was just shocked to see how pathetically VJ was cheated.The first goal came off from the opponents in like less than 10 seconds...

Thursday, July 17, 2008

heyquite a long time since i updated the blog..so i thought maybe i should do that today..lolso welll things are qutie fine these days..and i havent been feeling tired lately...coz of dont know what RUNNING...

Wednesday, July 9, 2008

"The Diary Of Jane"Breaking BenjaminIf I had toI would put myself right beside youSo let me askWould you like that?Would you like that?And I don't mindIf you say this love is the last timeSo now I'll askDo you like that?Do you like that?No!Something's getting in the way.Something's just about to break.I...

Tuesday, July 8, 2008

well....contrary to what people are thinking about my last post...i think i should explain what was meant by the last post..Me + 0 = MysteryWhen i started out with nothing, "0", it was almost like a mystery to me, coz evn i dint know the solutions...Me + 1 = Fun OutingAfter a while, i found certain...

Monday, July 7, 2008

Me + 0 = MysteryMe + 1 = Fun OutingMe + Angel = LIFEMe + Angel + LIFE = L O V E &l...

Sunday, July 6, 2008

well,i dont know what to say, i mean,my absence is just the right thing...as it is visible, but if thats one of the paths, then i dont mind taking it for the sake of...deep inside me those small things, hit me like a dart..but haiz, no one can do anything much about it...guess, those expectations, those...

Wednesday, July 2, 2008

haiz,i feel so down so not in the mood to do anything..i mean come on anyone would feel the dame way...and esp. when its abt someone you've known from the first second you stepped on this planet. omg...i was freaking sad ystrday,went cycling to ECP to relieve myself..guess, it was not that bad after...

Saturday, June 21, 2008

heyback in s'pore nowand i m havin quite a lazy time herethink i'll take some time to get back to the routine...hahaanyways, i'll be leaving for thailand soon in like another 10 hours, and till then, i m not expecting to sleep coz of the Euro '08 match and also the l8r chores that i have to finish..so...

Monday, June 16, 2008

aaarrrgh, 2 days to go, and i am so bored..i dont know where to get on from here...i mean, should i carry it on, and go through, tearing away all that comes in the way, or should i do it in the old fashioned WAY..i dont know,i mean, ya...nvr mindso well, here i am,i miss ppl so much...so much so that,...

Friday, June 6, 2008

hey guys..i dont know what to say here,but i feel like kicking myself..i feel so bad...and now that the communication gaps are blurred,i cant even see across the bridge,and in a hope to rebuild a new bridge,i cant find my angel,it seems to be lost, or should i sayit got lost coz of my carelessness,and...

Thursday, June 5, 2008

lately i have been thinking about something..and i realised that maybe the world hasnt yet matured to an extent to define relationships in 'broader' senses..ya. I had this thought last evening, when i was thinking about this wonderfully special person whom i know..(YES ITS U, IF u R READING THIS..u...